Don’t open that next bottle of wine just yet. Whatever you have in your glass, finish it, and listen to a few unavoidable truths I have learned about heartbreak from the unfortunate memorization tactic of repetition.
You’re sad now, I understand. It’s been about ten days since he’s reached out to you last, and maybe two weeks since he’s told you that you’re beautiful. He’s been busy, he said. Finals or whatever, he said.
It’s not that you don’t think you deserve better, but rather that you don’t want anyone better else. Not-awful-looking men have been talking to you, and you’ve thought about a few of them, but none of them say your name in a way that leaves your skin gripping tighter to your bones like he can.
His eyes have, without invitation, imprinted themselves in your mind. But his words, or lack thereof, speak louder than the piercing eyes in the back of your skull. He isn’t there for you, and he has left you unhappy.
Okay, pop the wine; let’s get on with the advice:
- Take your happiness back into your own hands; keep it within reach.
- It is not his job to remind you that you’re beautiful. While it’s nice, and always encouraged, you won’t believe he finds you beautiful if you cannot honestly agree with him.
- Take time for yourself, whether it is 6 hours or 6 weeks. If you are already struggling to keep him around or responding to you, re-dedicate yourself to something that you love. Not someone. Find something you are passionate about, and do it every day. Don’t call him.
- Tell your friends you love them, and focus on your healthy relationships. When you learn to love the people around you, you learn to love yourself. It wasn’t the world that hurt you; the world is still laughing with you.
- Laugh. Even if you don’t mean it, laugh. One day you’ll realize that sad forced laugh has evolved into a full-stomach cackle, and you’ll forget how to stop laughing.
You won’t forget the pain you felt, but eventually you will forget the way he held your hand. His piercing eyes will start to fade from your memory. The feeling of his hand around your waist will dissolve into a faint blur. Your heart will hurt less, and you will curl your hair for dates on Saturday nights again.
“Happiness” and “him” will stop being synonyms.
**Author Note: This is a personal topic that’s been close to my heart lately so I’ve attached a webcam (not edited) photo of myself opposed to the usual stock photo. Believe you’re beautiful, ladies. 😉